


the moment

by myfanticalromance



Category: Supernatural
Genre: 5 + 1, Alternate Universe, Alternate Universe - High School, Anxiety, Destiel - Freeform, Dorks in Love, Emotional, Falling In Love, Fluff, Fluff and Humor, M/M, Model UN, No Angst, Series of One Shots, So Sappy, maybe a little lol but not in the relationship, more tags to come
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-10-17
Updated: 2018-05-14
Packaged: 2019-01-18 12:45:54
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 4
Words: 4,373
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12388359
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/myfanticalromance/pseuds/myfanticalromance
Summary: Five times Dean Winchester thinks he’s in love with Castiel Novak and one time he says it





	1. the moment you think it

“You know, you’re ridiculously laid back for a teenager,” Castiel’s father says, sitting across from Dean, the hot summer sun causing his beer to sweat water that gathers in a pool around the bottle. 

“What can I say? I like to stop and enjoy the small things in life, sir,” Dean responds, a laugh marking the end of his statement. 

“Cheers to that, son. Maybe your philosophy will rub off on Castiel. Get him to loosen up a bit.”

“Another beer sir? I’m aching for another one of these classy Capri Suns.”

“Nah, thanks though. Tell the others we’re taking the boat again in about fifteen minutes. I want Alfie’s kids to get another round on the tube before they have to go.”

“Will do sir.”

Dean gets up from the chair, wincing as his skin unsticks itself, glued to the chair with sweat. He shuffles around until he finds his flip flops and starts up the stairs to the lake house. He’s made it up a few when he hears a voice behind him. 

“Son?”

“Yes sir?”

“Don’t call me sir. It makes me feel old. It’s just Chuck.”

“Alright just Chuck.”

“Real funny kid.”

Dean laughs as climbs the stairs to the house. He can hear the chaos ensuing inside. He walks up more stairs to the main level and is greeted with a lovely sight. 

His boyfriend looks frazzled and there’s three kids and a dog hanging off him. Gabriel is rooting around in the pantry with Anna cackling in the background. Castiel is threatening Gabriel in Enochian to protect the ears of kids around him. 

“Wow babe. I didn’t know you had that in you,” Dean says as he goes to Castiel’s aid, picking up a toddler. 

“Please help me. Naomi left me with her kids and Harper stole Emma’s toy and won’t give it back and I don’t know what to do,” Castiel says, panic edging into his voice. 

“Well, you’re lucky that your boyfriend is a master at dealing with kids,” Dean says, bouncing the toddler in his arms to keep her from crying, “Don’t worry Harper. We’ll get your toy back.”

“Promise?” the toddler says, leaking out of the corners of her eyes. 

“Of course sweetheart! Why don’t you go upstairs and pick out another toy while I talk to your sister?” Dean puts her down and she runs up the stairs, blonde curls bouncing with every step. While Dean was talking to Harper, Castiel coerced Anna into dealing with Emma as Gabriel took the remaining child upstairs for a nap. 

Castiel falls into Dean’s arms,

“Thank you so much. Calculus? Easy. Children? I can’t deal with.”

“Only you would think that calculus is easier then children babe,” Dean says, pressing his lips into Castiel’s dark hair. 

<•><•><•><•><•><•><•><•><•><•><•>

Dean wakes up slowly, enjoying the peace of the morning before the day starts. He enjoys the silence for a few more minutes before sliding out of bed, careful to not wake his sleeping boyfriend up. He walks down the stairs into the kitchen and pours himself a mug of coffee from the pot sitting on the counter. He sits down at the table across from Castiel’s brother Michael, who’s reading the newspaper. 

“‘Morning.”

“‘Morning.”

They sit in silence, exchanging pages from the newspaper every few minutes. Too soon, the kids start waking up and running around. How they have this much energy in the morning is beyond Dean but they all remind him of Sammy as kid. Young and full of hope and excitement. 

Michael ditches Dean in favor of helping getting the boat ready for the long day ahead. Soon enough, Castiel plops himself down in what was Michael’s seat while Gabriel sits on the counter, taunting one of the little kids by withholding the Fruit Loops

“C’mon Gabe. Give it back to the kids. It’s too early for this shit.”

“You’re no fun Cassie.”

“Screw off.”

Dean laughs at the exchange and gets up to take the Fruit Loops from Gabriel. He gives it to Harper then pours himself enough mug of coffee. 

The adults finally start filing into the kitchen and start making real breakfast. The room is filled with small chatter as everyone prepares for the day ahead of them. 

“85 and humid. Perfect boat weather.” Chuck announces to the room. 

Groans come from Anna and Gabriel. 

“Why is it so fucking hot?” Anna laments, dramatically throwing herself across the table. 

“Language, Anael,” Naomi says, appearing out of seemingly nowhere, already dressed with a full face of makeup. 

Anna rolls her eyes and walks upstairs to get changed. 

“What’s the plan for today, Dad?” Castiel asks, speaking for the first time in awhile. 

“Well, if we leave in like fifteen minutes we can get some big kid tubing in before the brats realize what’s going on.”

“HELL YEAH” Gabriel says, fists in the air. 

This time Naomi whacks Gabriel with a rolled up newspaper and chides at him in Enochian. Gabriel snickers as he runs upstairs. 

Dean stands up and offers his hand to Castiel,

“Meet you on the dock Chuck?”

“Fifteen minutes. Don’t be late or we’ll leave without you.”

“He’s not kidding,” says Castiel as he stands up with a groan, “I’m going to need more coffee before ‘big kid tubing’”

“Me too babe, me too.”

<•><•><•><•><•><•><•><•><•><•><•>

“JOYEUSE FÊTE DU CANADA!” Gabriel yells from the dock. 

Fireworks illuminate Castiel’s face, casting shadows across his cheekbones. Castiel turns to face Dean from his position between Dean’s legs. 

“I swear to god, you give him one damn piece of candy and he doesn’t shut up for hours. I don’t get it Dean. We’re not even Canadian.”

“I gave up trying to understand your family months ago. Remember when one of Alfie’s watched me sleep because it was “relaxing”?”

“Ruby is going to be a serial killer when she grows up. I’m calling it now.”

The nonchalance of the statement and the fireworks in the background stir something inside of Dean as he reflects on the perfect weekend that he’s been having. 

Hours spent on the boat tubing. His arms ache from holding on and his stomach aches from laughing as Chuck tried so hard to throw the teenagers off. His back and face ache from sunburn that’s going to start peeling in a few days. He remembers Chuck’s stories of the siblings growing up and Castiel and Gabriel’s protesting. Saying that Chuck’s exaggerating and making stuff up. He remembers hanging out with Castiel’s redneck cousin Benny on the pontoon boat and doing flips off the top. He remembers Castiel’s aunt Naomi looking him in the eyes whilst very drunk and telling him to never have kids. Dean remembers playing in the lake with the kids and staring into Castiel’s blue eyes. He remembers nights spent in bed, not doing or saying anything. Just listening to the cicadas outside and falling asleep knowing that the next day will be a cycle of food, boating, and fun. And Dean remembers laughing. Laughing so hard he cried. Laughing so hard he can’t breathe. Dean loves coming to Castiel’s family friend’s lake house but most importantly? Dean loves Castiel.


	2. the moment you think you know it

Dean’s alarm goes off right in his ear, subsequently scaring the ever loving shit out of him,

“FUCK!”

He searches around for the source of the violently offensive noise, and smacks snooze as soon as possible. Dean groans as he sinks back into his warm blankets, contemplating getting up. He was up until two in the morning doing apush homework. Something Dean will never understand is why his teacher thought assigning twenty four pages of reading on a weekday was a good idea. By the time Dean ended up going to bed, he was only thinking in terms of British policies to control the colonists. 

After he presses snooze another three times, he finally drags himself out of bed, much to his inner self’s chagrin. Without thinking much, he pulls on the first pair of matching clothes he can find and stumbles down the creaky stairs of his childhood home. Throwing himself down at the kitchen table where Sam is already sitting, he pulls out his phone. 

Dean: ‘morning sunshine

Cas<3: Good morning, Dean. How did you sleep?

Dean: i mean the little i did sleep was great, hbu?

Cas<3: Pretty good, thanks. You have a test in pre-calc today, correct?

Dean: yeah. it’s on identities and all that stuff. 

Cas<3: Ah, I remember that. It’s all easy once you get the hang of it. 

Dean: ofc you think it’s easy mr. multi var. 

Cas<3: I don’t understand what you mean. 

Dean: whatever.  
oh good luck on your lang essay today. you’ll do great. 

Cas<3: Thanks Dean. I’ll see you in apush third period. 

Dean: kk. see you then. 

Dean smiles softly into his coffee mug at this exchange, only looking up when he hears Sam’s smirk. 

“You two are sickening.”

“Shut up Sammy.”

<•><•><•><•><•><•><•><•><•><•><•>

Dean slides into his seat just as the bell rings, earning himself a dirty look from his teacher. 

“Alright guys! Homework to me and backpacks up front. You guys should get started as quickly as possible.”

Dean’s best friend Charlie leans over after the teacher finishes talking,

“You ready?”

“Hell no.”

On that resounding note, the test began. 

An hour and a half later, Dean walks out of the classroom with his head spinning as he tries to remember the godforsaken formula for the tangent of a double angle. This fills Dean’s thoughts on the long walk from pre-calc to apush. He walks into the classroom and to his normal seat. Front of the room, but next to Castiel. 

“Hey babe.”

“Hello, Dean. How did pre-calc go?”

“What’s the formula for the tangent of a double angle?”

“It’s 2 tan x / 1 - tan^2 x.”

“Fuck. I thought there was cosine somewhere in there.”

“No that’s half angles babe.”

“Goddammit. How did lang go?”

“Not bad! The prompt was super easy. It was on religious connections in a text we had read.”

“That’s great!”

“Can you come over after school? I have a mock for Model UN tomorrow and I feel like my opening remarks are weak.”

“Of course. Why don’t you come to my place?”

“If it’s not too much trouble, then sure.”

“Of course not. I’ll text my dad n-“

The bell cuts Dean and signals the beginning of class and consequently, the end of their conversation. 

“Good morning class? Are y’all ready to learn how the white people fucked over all the other white people?”

And with that, apush began. 

<•><•><•><•><•><•><•><•><•><•><•>

The moment Dean walks outside he’s assaulted by the harsh October wind. He takes a minute to adjust to the temperature that is vastly different from the school then walks over to where his friend’s are huddled, 

“What’s up losers?”

“Who ya calling a loser, loser,” Gabriel spits back at Dean, who promptly rolls his eyes. 

“Anyway, what are talking about?”

“My bitch of a chem teacher. She yelled at me for ‘not following directions’. It’s not my fault I’m dyslexic.”

“Gabe, you’re barely dyslexic,” Sam says, with an exasperated sigh. 

“That’s a technicality Samsquatch”

“Whatever guys, Cas and I gotta go do homework. Have any of you seen him?”

“I think he said he had to talk to his multi var teacher, the nerd,” Charlie says. 

“He should be back soon,” Sam adds

Sure enough, three minutes later, Castiel walks over to the group of losers, 

“Good afternoon, friends.”

“Hey Cassie.”

“‘Sup man.”

“Hey Cas.”

“Hi babe.”

After ten minutes of casual banter, the group heads their respective ways with Sam, Dean, and Cas walking to Dean’s Impala. They get into the car and Dean pulls out of the parking lot. 

They drive through the streets of Lawrence, Kansas. Lawrence is the typical mid-west small town with family owned businesses with endless cornfields as their backdrop. Lawrence is a sleepy little town that nobody would pay attention to if they drove through, but to those who live there, it’s magical. You see, if you just drive through Lawrence you miss all its charm. You miss the 24 hour diner, Rose’s, which is one of the best damn diners in the country. You miss the general store on Main with the old man who always gives candy to the kids and cigs to the adults. You miss the old church where kids go to play. You cannot just drive through Lawrence because Lawrence is special, at least according to those who live there. 

Dean and Sam Winchester live on East 23rd street in a two story house with white trim and an old oak tree in the front yard. It doesn’t look like much to those who just pass by but to us, it is the epicenter of our story. 

Dean pulls into the garage and the three get out of the car.

“Dad? Are you home?” Dean yells as he closed to garage door. 

He is met with no response until he reaches the kitchen where is he is met with a note in his father’s scrawling handwriting:

Work called. New case in Wichita, serial rapist who just started murdering. Shouldn’t be more than two weeks. Money’s in the normal place. Call Bobby if you have any issues. 

-Dad

John Winchester is an interesting man. He hunts monsters. Real monsters. He hunts the monsters that hide in kid’s closets, waiting to pounce. He hunts the monsters that earn themselves a one way ticket to the ninth ring of Hell. John Winchester is a former Marine and an FBI agent and he takes pride in his work because John Winchester is still hunting down the man, no, the monster who killed his wife 12 years ago. 

“Where is he this time?” Sam asks, in a bored tone. 

“Wichita.”

<•><•><•><•><•><•><•><•><•><•><•>

“Dean, can you take this seriously?”

“I am!”

“No you’re not.”

“Yeah I am!”

“Fine, let me start over,” Castiel clears his throat and begins his speech, for the third time, “Good afternoon delegates.”

Dean watches him. His opening speech doesn’t last more than a minute but it feels like hours and Dean watches him. He isn’t even listening to Castiel’s words at this point but he knows that they’re right. When Dean watches Castiel he sees a teenager who is so smart and so passionate. When Dean watches Castiel he sees someone who will be the best public defender out there because Castiel cares so much about everything. Whether it’s child marriage while representing Ukraine or the demilitarization of the arctic while representing India, Castiel puts all his soul into his speechs and when he speaks it’s mesmerizing. That’s generally what’s expected from a 14 gavel in a row, Model UN prodigy but it doesn’t take away from how into the topic Castiel gets and Dean loves that about him. And that’s why Dean thinks he loves Castiel.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hey kids. 145 hits in 48 hours??? what the fuck? that’s so validating and awesome and I love you all. ya know what else I love? model un. you should all join ;)
> 
> as always, please please please comment and kudo!! it really truly does make my day and I love you for it


	3. the moment you know it

It’s one in the morning on a pitiful Tuesday and Dean Winchester isn’t having it. He started his homework hours ago and he’s still not done. The cold December air bangs the shutters against his window. It’s been a long month of praying for the weekend, clinging on to the hope that maybe he will have free time over the weekend then being let down by all the homework that’s assigned on Friday. Worse than all of that, he hasn’t spent time with Castiel outside of school in at least a week and a half. Dean Winchester is about thirty seconds from a stress induced breakdown and it’s not fun. 

In a last ditch effort to calm himself down, he throws down his pen and picks up his phone before sending a quick text to Castiel. 

Dean: hey r u up?

Cas<3: I was about to head to bed, but yes.  
Do you need something? 

Dean: nah u go to bed it’s okay 

Cas<3: If you need to talk, I don’t mind staying up a bit longer

Dean: no go to bed we have school tmrw. im just really stressed right now. 

A few minutes go by without a text from Castiel and Dean puts his phone down and his head in his hands. He gives himself until the count of thirty before he has to start working again. He gets to 27 when his phone rings. Not even looking at who’s calling he picks up, desperate to not start his homework again. 

“Hello?” he says, with a yawn. 

“Dean, it’s me. Look outside your window.”

Confused, Dean walks to his window and peaks outside. Castiel’s car sits in his driveway and a surge of a feeling Dean can’t place goes through his body. 

“You still there, Dean?”

“Yeah. Come inside it’s freezing out there.”

“I have a better idea. Bring your homework and come down.”

“Give me a sec, I need to change out of my stupid Batman PJs.”

“Don’t bother, Dean. Batman is cool, remember?”

“Batman is the coolest. I’ll be down in a minute.”

And with that he hangs up the phone and shoves his stuff into his backpack. 

<•><•><•><•><•><•><•><•><•><•><•>

Waffle House. Castiel takes him to Waffle House. Not that Dean’s complaining or anything, Waffle House is the single greatest place on this planet. 

“Alright, Dean. What do you want me to do?”

“You don’t have to do anything, Cas. Just sit there and encourage me.”

“Nonsense. Let me at least do your pre-calc homework. It’ll be fun for me.”

“Nerd.”

“Loser.”

With that they start working, spread out across a booth in Waffle House at 1:37 AM on a cold and dreary December Tuesday. They work in silence but it’s what isn’t said that matters. To someone who looks but does not observe, they see two boys doing homework with coffee and waffles. To someone who observes, however, they see two boys who are so in love that it screams out in every single mannerism. The way their feet lightly touch. The way they work together in perfect harmony. The way that they sneak glances at each other when they think the other isn’t paying attention. The small smile on both of their faces, even as they’re working through tedious work. To one who observes, they see one person sitting in that booth at Waffle House, writing furiously like their life depends on it. 

<•><•><•><•><•><•><•><•><•><•><•>

They leave Waffle House sometime after 2 AM and silently drive back to Dean’s house. Castiel pulls into Dean’s driveway and puts the car in park. Before Castiel can say anything, Dean blurts out,  
“Stay. Please.”  
He considers it for a minute before saying,  
“Of course.”  
Dean internally breathes a sigh of relief before getting out of the car and grabbing his backpack out of the back seat. Castiel grabs his keys and his phone before also grabbing Dean’s hand and they walk into the Winchester house. 

Castiel smiles as he passes the threshold, being careful not to trip on the doorway like he did a thousand times as a kid. His fingers graze over a dent in the wall as they walk through the living room to the stairs. That dent is from the time it was raining outside so a bunch of them tried to play baseball inside and failed miserably. They had almost knocked over a framed picture of the Winchester family from when Mary and the Winchester’s old golden retriever, Lucy, had been alive. Lucy was old at the time and died shortly after Mary, presumably from heartbreak. John promptly yelled at them and sent the Novak clan home. Later that night Dean had called Castiel on the long range walkie talkies that they used and had told Castiel how much fun he had had. Castiel smiles as all the memories of his childhood flood through his mind, reminding him of simpler times. 

The Winchester house holds so many memories. Good and bad. Despite being hand in hand with who he would later realize to be the love of his life, Dean can only recall the bad memories. The day Mary died. The first time John came home so drunk he mistook Dean for Dean’s grandfather. The first fight he had with John. The first time John left. The first time John h-

“Dean?”

Sam’s sleepy voice rips Dean from his trip down memory lane.

“Yeah?”

“Why are you home so late? And why is Cas here?”

“Don’t worry about it Sammy. Go back to bed.”

With that Dean pulls Castiel into his room and closes the door behind him. Silently they get ready for bed, which really only entails throwing their stuff down and plugging in their phones. Dean keeps a separate charger plugged in for when Castiel stays over, which happens more often than Dean would care to admit. They get into bed and just lie there for awhile. It’s almost three and they have to be up again in four hours to make it to school on time, especially since Castiel has to drop by his house to grab his stuff for school. 

In that moment Dean reflects on his life. Just thinking and processing what happened. Dean doesn’t know a lot of things in life, like the formula for the tangent of a double angle, still. Or when the Alien and Sedition Acts were passed. Or what the importance of the jail was in The Scarlet Letter. Or what college he was going to go to. Or what his sexuality was. But at 2:57 AM on that dreary December Tuesday, Dean Winchester knew for certain one thing. He loved Castiel Novak.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> hey to anyone reading this  
> yes it’s been forever lol and im sorry. i got super busy and blah blah blah. 
> 
> im hoping to get the rest of this up and finished this week tbh but we’ll see. 
> 
> pls comment or kudo or both! it really brightens my day and I could really use a lot of that right now. 
> 
> thanks so much for reading.


	4. the moment you know it but can’t say it

If Dean was being perfectly honest, it didn’t take any convincing at all to let him, Castiel, Sam, and Gabriel road trip across Kansas. John wasn’t even home during their spring break. Chuck had taken some convincing but it worked out in the end. He was mostly happy to get rid of Gabriel for an entire week. He had recently discovered a new brand of energy drinks which only made him more hyper and insane than normal. 

It had taken them a month of combining all their money to have enough to safely and comfortably travel across Kansas. They didn’t really have a plan or a destination, just to drive across the entire state. Dean didn’t even know how they came up with the idea. In his opinion, Kansas was the most boring state in the entire United States. It’s just flat corn fields that went on for miles and miles. Kansas is a shithole. There’s nothing except hicks and nobodies and Dean cannot wait to leave for college. He doesn’t care where he goes, so long as it’s far away from Kansas. In actuality, he will probably end up following Castiel wherever he goes. 

Dean was shaken from his thoughts by Gabriel’s voice in the backseat, yelling at the top of his lungs,

“Dean! Turn up the fucking radio!”

Dean listens for a second before saying back,

“One Direction? Seriously, Gabriel?”

“Turn it the fuck up before I do it myself.”

“Jesus Christ, calm down Gabriel,” Sam says from the backseat. 

“Not until Dean turns up the radio.”

“Fine. Okay. I give up. You win.”

With that, Dean turns up the radio as loud as it can go and Gabriel cheers as the car is filled with the sound of the boyband. Gabriel knows every single word, of course, and sings along in a key that isn’t remotely close to the key the song is in. Dean can hear Sammy and Cas laughing as Gabriel sings and dances along horribly. Dean can’t help but join them in laughing as Sam joins Gabriel in singing along off key to some old One Direction song Dean hasn’t even heard in years. Out of the corner of his eye he can see Cas start to hum along and he whips around, tearing his eyes from the road, to exclaim,

“Castiel! You too? I feel so betrayed right now.” 

“C’mon babe. Nobody can resist One Direction!”  
“I can!”

It was moments like that that made Dean realize how much he had to live for. It seemed too silly to say out loud but Dean’s entire life up to that point had been defined by his father and for once, for once, Dean had something that was his. Something that his father couldn’t rip away from him. Something to live for. Because when he looked over to the passenger’s seat of his car and saw him singing his lungs out to some damn One Direction song, with the damn Kansas cornfields flying by at 70 miles an hour, Dean saw Castiel and for once, Dean could smile and not have to think about his future, because Dean knew that Castiel was his future. Dean knew that he was irrevocably and irrefutably in love Castiel and he couldn’t do a single damn thing about it.

Many hours later they all sat in a dirty booth at some run-down diner and they just talked and laughed. Four friends in a booth who dreamt of the stars and love and talked about everything in between. Hundreds of miles between them and that history paper that was due in a week but those hundreds of miles felt like hundreds of years. In that booth, in that two-stoplight town in the middle of Kansas, they were completely untouchable.

A week later, when that history paper was due, Dean and Castiel shared a knowing look as they turned it in. A look that was full of the late nights spent driving down a two-way highway, the only sound being the snores of Sam and Gabriel in the backseat and the subtle droning of the radio in the background. Out there, among the cornfields Dean hated so much, they could see every single star and they counted every single one together. A look that was full of the hours spent laughing over some stupid pun Gabriel couldn’t help but make. A look that was full of the pain in their chest after they had to outrun the cops because they broke into some abandoned warehouse in the middle of nowhere. A look that was full of them falling even more in love with each other, but not being able to say it.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> okay yes i know it’s short, shitty, and overdue and i apologize. 
> 
> this is loosely based off my life and experiences but this has a much happier ending so writing this can be emotionally draining. 
> 
> also this chapter is sappy as shit. blame sleep deprivation and indie music. 
> 
> as always, please kudo or comment! it really brightens my day :)
> 
> thanks for entertaining my heartbroken 1 am rambles and hopefully it won’t be two months before i update again, but no promises.


End file.
